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The way the bullying of Karen Klein has generated thousands of supporters and the denunciation, on the other hand, of the cruel and despicable acts of those student bullies is a very encouraging sign that the world is still peopled by those who believe in nurturing respect and compassion and in the value that to spare the rod is to spoil the child. Though not to be taken literally, it points out the crying need to train and show our children the path to being human and treating others with dignity. Life can be a cycle of conflicts and it's hard to pinpoint who is to blame for today's growing teenage delinquency: Is it parental negligence? Society's degenerating morals? The laws that purport to protect the rights of the child but thwart the rights of parents to become parents, or teachers to become teachers? At the heart of this is: how do we really love our children? Is it by becoming permissive? Should the law take away parental authority? These can be challenging questions and just as challenging as the parenting tasks.
Developing compassion and respect for others can begin actually from early childhood. James Baldwin once said, "Children have never been good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them." Do parents practice what they teach? An anti-bias curriculum was once offered at our Los Angeles Valley College here where we reside. Shouldn't such subject be taught earlier than college level, from the elementary level, as a matter of fact? In a Linguistics subject I had taken up before, I wrote a paper on this as a way of critiquing on a magazine called Teaching Tolerance. I rather didn't go for the wor "tolerance" since it somehow connotes some kind of condescension. I would rather go for the phrase "respecting the dignity of every individual." Anti-bias includes being against racism, sexism, ageism, homophobia, handicapism, semitism, etc. In the family, perhaps, parents will be more effective if they demonstrate their own respect for the individual, for the human being, regardless of what each one is. As Father Alexander would say, God loves all of us. Period.
But to go back to Ms. Klein, the outpouring of sympathy for her and the money donations showered on her show just how many compassionate hearts there still are in this earth. This is the virtue those boys should emulate. They need to wake up now with the message of those who have heard of this 68-year-old woman having been victimized with the verbal abuse: cruelty does not pay. And what has been done as consequence to the bullies? Are their apologies (forced by their parents) enough to make up for their transgressions? Is there true remorse? No amends? No corrective action, even if only some community service? What can their parents make them do to sensitize them? In my sons' school before (the Jesuit-run Ateneo University in Manila, Philippines), I remember how the high school students could not graduate without undergoing an immersion into an environment of poverty where each lived for a week with a poor family, eat what they ate, bathed in the family's makeshift bathroom, washed their own clothes, helped in the house chores, etc . If that were to be done here in America, there's the likelihood of an uproar from some parents who would think such should not be forced on their children.
So, what is to be done in the case of these boys who bullied Ms Klein? Would an immersion into life in a facility of the aged open their eyes on how they will be in their own golden years, learn how to help (and hopefully, love) instead of bully old people?
Shouldn't it be high time politicians and lawmakers got down into a rigid examination of government policies and family laws and started a re- interpretation of freedom with all its ramifications. An admission that some laws or their limitations have abetted the practice of license and delinquency among youngsters whose sense of judgment has not fully developed yet---this would be a good start. Take the case of a student who was reported to have created a Facebook group page against her teacher and instigated others to "express your feelings of hatred. ' After she was suspended from school, she retaliated with a suit against the school principal and was, according to the reports, represented by the American Civil Liberties Union.that argued that her right to freedom of speech was violated. She is said to have won and got $15,000 to cover her legal fees. Then her suspension was struck from her school record. How many other such students are likely to follow suit? Can you imagine expressing your criticism of your teacher in public and winning thousands of dollars to boot. Wow! Below is a reaction from someone from Columbia, South Carolina, as appeared in facebook.
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Columbia, South Carolina
722users liked this comment
6,114 comments
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michael • Charleston, South Carolina • Report Abuse
I have a silly idea, why don't we just teach kids that their actions have consequences.
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Becca Report Abuse
What, leave politics alone just for a minute, please? Sick of seeing politically themed posts that are irrelevant to the issue at hand!
Michael, you are right. The problem is the kind of unrelenting consistency and follow up good parenting requires seems like something many parents are... More -
Donny Report Abuse
(Sarcasm) No, that would be too mean. It might destroy their self-esteem, we can't have them thinking they are all the greatest person that ever lived, despite whatever crummy things they do to others.
And you've got to be kidding, "republicans blah, blah, blah?" How irrelevant is that here?
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Groovymack3 • Report Abuse
This is what happens when parents are scared they may upset their kids with discipline
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Becca Report Abuse
Some kids call the law and then are removed from the home to live among others like themselves. DCFS doesn't look kindly on spanking and even other forms of discipline, sadly.
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Don M Report Abuse
Spanking is one form of discipline and if doen the right way it is not cruel or harmful. Parents need to understand that discipline is not out of anger but out of love for the child.
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Johnny Exchange Report Abuse
Sometimes kids(who are little people) are just scumbags. they make the choices to do horrible things for a feeling of power or superity. Just a week ago in my town a few punk kids killed a chinese food delivery man, then went inside and ate the food. Kids who are scumbags as kids will most likely grow up to be bigger scumbags. Let these bus bullies get punished with legal action friggin little lowlifes!
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wakeupamerica • Dallas, Texas • Report Abuse
Kids are not being taught at an early age to respect authority or their elders. Just go to any restaurant and you will see kids staring blankly into an electronic device so the parents can "get some peace". And before you criticize me, I am a parent of two elememtary ages kids. The only time they get electronic devices it is a privledge...such as a long airplane ride. Parents need to take the time to connect with their kids, teach them manners and respect for others. Volunteer with them and help to develop empathy at an early age. I am stunned when their teachers and other adults come up to me and tell me how well mannered and polite my kids are....just for saying "please and thank you". Thirty years ago that was just a normal part of child rearing...sad that kids today do not have these basic skills. I cringe to think of the offspring that this generation produces!
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Denise Report Abuse
And how many of these kids are learning their behavior from watching their parents? Just read many of the comments posted here to have a partial idea of how many adults today react to others, whether another poster or even the President, and you have an idea of what kids are being taught at home.
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Tanisha Report Abuse
It's not the electronic devices, it's the lack of parenting. My girls have all sorts of gadgets but they know respect. And if they get out of line, it's my job to scoot their little butts right back into it. My girls are sweet and polite with manners that children are supposed to have. There is no... More
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Ann Report Abuse
I cringe to think of the offspring that this generation produces! We're already seeing it on the streets shooting people and in the juvenile courts.
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LS • Report Abuse
My dad would have whipped my Arss for disrespect for an elder. Kids now are numb and dumb.
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Mr B Report Abuse
I went school were teachers use those 3-foot ruler to hit any student misbehaving and when our parents find out we get it from them too. My dad used to say to me 'if the teacher had to go that distance on discipline I must have done something wrong' so get some spanking from him. Now I'm afraid if lay hands on my kids I end up in jail.
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michael • Guntown, Mississippi • Report Abuse
I remember the days when young people where the hope of the future!!
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Now days I wonder what kind of future we are going to have?
People MAKE your kids behave. If someone tells you your kids are messing up and you say not my kids YOU are part of the problem.-
22users liked this commentPlease sign in to rate a Thumb UpPlease sign in to rate a Thumb Down125users disliked this commenti know who i am Report Abuse
ya ya, we told the leaders that we don't want their stinking wars but it goes on anyway...why expect more from their kids?
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Lloyd Report Abuse
Today's kids are far more rebellious that those of past generations. As a society, we have become weak and afraid to discipline our lousy acting brats. It's time to get some backbone and punish our little punks, and when they get old enough to leave the nest, then hold the door open while we boot... More
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sandy j • Conway, Arkansas • Report Abuse
As for kids bulling teachers, instructors.. Then send the stupid little twits home and don't let them back in school.. let the parent take the kid from there, since the parent doesn't seem to want to teach the child respect and a lessen in humanity.. And another thing take the
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DAMN computer... More -
A • New York, New York • Report Abuse
Being 13 years old myself, even I agree that some kids these days have absolutely no respect for adults and it does shock me. I was always taught to be respectful to my elders. There is a one-word cure for this issue: Discipline!
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Kukla • Report Abuse
Discipline your children by removing and taking away their cell phones and controlling their computer access to the internet facebook and other social networks. Start parenting again.
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Ramona • Report Abuse
Parents need to start being parents again. This generation is growing up without a sense of responsibility. They have no respect for adults because there are no consequences for their actions. If my child had been caught doing this, she STILL wouldn't be able to sit down!
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YouKidMe • Report Abuse
We were working at the city park watering plants and asked the young kids(some elementary jr. high age) to stay away from the open manhole I was guarding, where the water hose was.One child tried to bounce a ball into it.The biggest girl said we were restricting their rights to make them stay away. The parents called the police on us for harassing them. The policeman was apologetic. I had to endure seeing us in the police report of the local paper, however. I had to explain that to my boss.
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Christopher • Report Abuse
I can remember being scared to death that I would get into trouble at school and then face my parents. But now, kids raise hell at school and then the parents show up to back them up. God help teachers today.
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CL • Columbia, South Carolina • Report Abuse
If the ACLU, can help a student to file suit, against the principal....win $15,000, and have her suspension "wiped from her record", where is the Bullying Act? Was this a jury trial? I'm sorry, but the "freedom of speech" does NOT include your right to encourage OTHERS to "join in".....this is just... More
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Cook • Report Abuse
These kids knew what they were doing.... they must be punished for their actions, if they were on their own they would not do such a thing, but in a group suddenly they are "brave and funny".... this was not funny at all, School must take action in spite the lady won't press charges!
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Mixed Chick • Report Abuse
Lazy parents that don't want their little brats to hate them expect everyone else to do their job and yes we have kids and no we don't allow them to have cell phones or sit in front of the computer constantly, they actually physically move and as a result are not obese like to many kids...one of... More
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herman • Augusta, Georgia • Report Abuse
what this behavior shows is , the kids involved have NEVER been taught enough respect for others , because the PARENTS don't have respect for others !!!!! these half pints brats reflect exactly how their raised , and it has no color ,origin,or financial background ,just plain rotten to the core... More
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Jim • Report Abuse
If it were my kid , they would't be able to sit down for a week and they would be cleaning that womans house and mowing her yard untill they were 18.
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charlotte • Tampa, Florida • Report Abuse
Sad, but it doesn't say much about the parents of the kids from this generation.
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avg.citizen • Report Abuse
Many times when you conference with parents like these, you see the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. They are belligerent and rude, and some cuss during the conferences. Like these boys who saw themselves on video, they just don't believe they could be so mean and the don't pay attention to their actions or words. Some kids will have just said or done something a few seconds before and have the audacity to ask, "What did I do, I didn't do anything." This is the main reason education suffers. A teacher spends 10 to 15 minutes out of 40 minute class pds. correcting and redirecting disruptive, rude students who get the whole class distracted and laughing with their immature and rude comments. Districts, and administrators put it back on teachers to deal, but parent phone calls end up with the parents believing their child is an angel and parents think that teachers sit up nights trying to find ways to make their jobs harder. I've always said that if every adult had to try to get their job done, with 24 or more middle school students hanging out at their workplace, they'd see what teachers have to put up with, or better yet try teaching for a month. They wouldn't last a week.
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Superstar Impact • Report Abuse
One of my students launched a nasty twitter attack against me because I gave him detention for constantly ignoring my requests to be quiet during my instruction. I threatened to press charges but let him off the hook, by reading him the cyber bully law. I told him if he did it again I would revive this charge with the next. I reminded him I have up to a year to file the complaint. He was extremely apologetic. Teachers need to know the law so they can bring a real world reality to the student and some times the parents.
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